Using Positive Affirmations to adjust habits in thinking, and align ourselves with a greater Truth, can be extremely helpful in shifting our consciousness and manifesting what we want to experience. However, like any tool, it can be misused. This misuse can lead to frustration – as well as a sense of failure – not to mention the lack of experience of that which you are affirming! After using and teaching affirmations for over a decade with both successes and failures, I’d like to share with you what has worked (and not worked) for myself and my clients when using Positive Affirmations to change our lives.
- DO make your statement in the present tense. “I am” “I have” “I create” “I accept” “I claim” are all great ways to begin an affirmation. Our minds don’t know the difference between what we imagine and what we experience, so the more NOW you can put into it, the more likely it is to come into your life. When we boldly state that what we want is already ours, the Universe conspires to make it happen.
- DON’T use wishy-washy words like “I will” or “I can.” The Law of Attraction doesn’t exist in linear time, it exists in eternity where there is only this moment, and this moment, and this moment. Tomorrow never comes, for it is always today – affirm that what you want is yours today, not in some future time that may or may not arrive. And as far as “I can,” it just doesn’t have much power. Affirming you can attract love into your life is far from affirming love is already yours. When using affirmations, make them as powerful as possible.
Example: I claim that the perfect job that matches my qualifications and income requirements is already mine!
- DO clarify what you really want based on the experience you wish to have. This means investigating into your own desires. So you say you want a new job, but what do you really want? An opportunity to be a part of a successful group, a chance to stretch yourself, more validation and appreciation for your strengths, or maybe even a sense of accomplishment? Affirming your true desire will manifest it in more than one area of your life(yay!), so be clear with yourself what you want to experience on the inside and use that in your affirmation.
- DON’T describe what you don’t want to experience. For example, instead of affirming, “I am ready to stop gambling,” you might say, “I am free of any constrictions or habits that no longer serve my greater good.” Whatever we focus on we attract more of, so focus the attention of your affirmation on that which you are moving toward, not that which you wish to move away from. As you enthusiastically describe your new experience, it is drawn to you.
Example: I now release any beliefs, ideas, or habits that may have been in the way of me expressing my full potential as a musician.
- DON’T affirm what you can’t fathom for yourself. This is a big misunderstanding in using affirmations, because on the surface it seems that is exactly what they are for: affirming that you have that which you don’t appear to already have. The problem is that a lot of times we go too far, and the usefulness and power of the affirmation decreases. If I only have $5 to last me a week, and I begin affirming I am a millionaire, something in my head is going to push back and respond, “Nah-ah.” (think of arguing with a pre-teen or teenager) If you try out your affirmation, and you have a voice in your head retorting, “yeah, right, like that will ever happen,” then that voice has just counteracted your affirmation and you’re right back where you started. Part of changing our life is being aware of where we are, and starting from there. Even if you have to begin with small increments, it is better than using an affirmation that you don’t actually believe will ever happen.
- DO use gentle words when dealing with delicate issues. Most of us have baggage that goes way back, and deep-seated beliefs about our unworthiness that keep us from expressing our True Self. Using affirmations to heal our wounds can be very powerful if used properly. Just this week I began to affirm “I am proud of myself for ____.” I didn’t even get the whole sentence out and I felt a contraction in my stomach, as though being proud of myself was not allowed (it wasn’t in my childhood). I caught the inner reaction, and shifted my affirmation to “I give myself permission to be proud of_____.” This felt so much better! Please work with you the way that you are, not the way you wish you would be. Adding words like “I give myself permission” or “I am willing” before an affirmation about a tough issue can really help to keep those “Nah-ah” voices I mentioned earlier at bay. Sometimes, with a really deep belief, I’ll even affirm that I am “willing to be willing” to receive or express something. This really confuses the Ego and keeps it from ripping out the seed I am trying to plant.
Example: I am willing to allow more Love and Joy into my day-to-day experience of life.
I hope these tips help you to use affirmations to improve your own experience of yourself and your life. I’d love to answer any questions you may have and to discuss these ideas further. Feel free to post any affirmations you are working on here, and I will even give you some tips on how to make them more powerful. Happy Affirming!
As always with this work, it is often easier said than done. If you're ready to get the help you need, I'd love to chat with you. Apply for a Complimentary Discovery Session with me to discuss the best place to start. You'll get 45 minutes of my eyes on your issue. You don't have to do this alone.